Adulting is hard.
I just can't adult today.
I see these t-shirts around all the time - in public and on social media, mostly. They talk about "Adulting". I think this is a new slang term for being responsible, being socially conscious, setting a good example...you know, being a grown-up. And it can be, well, hard to do all the time.
I had already started writing this when a friend posted this article on social media. This is 100% true. We wear our masks that protect our weariness and frustrations, pull up our adult pants (no, not Depends!), and get on with our day. Every. Day.
"You got this, mama. Give yourself a break.
Having our shit together all the time is overrated anyway."
- Mia Carella aka Your Fellow Hot Mess Mom
Sometimes, we wake up, move through the day and say, "I got this!". And some days, well, shit storms hit and we turn around mid-way through the day and think "What the hell just happened?".
Adulting. Whether you have kids or not, it seems to be a constant mix of being responsible, problem-solving, time-management, schedule juggling, and more and more frequently, resident Uber driver. Ugh. Anyone feel me on this one?
Now, let me clarify a BIG something before I go any further- I've been adulting since I was 15. I've worked constantly since high school. It took me almost seven years to graduate from college with a Bachelor's Degree due to my responsibilities of working full-time and going to school simultaneously. I will finally pay off my college loans right before I start paying for my kiddos to begin college. I've worked for everything in my life, a lot of times, the hard way. I know responsibility, believe me. So, please don't think that I'm this party-animal that doesn't know how to be a grown adult. I'm proud of my path to adulthood and wouldn't have it any other way. It's made me a stronger person because of it.
But...there are those freedom moments that I missed when I was younger and sometimes, when the time is right, it's fun to just break loose of all of those "to-do's" and just celebrate!
A few weeks ago, that is exactly what I did. It was totally spontaneous and I think that's what makes it so much more exciting and FUN! I hardly ever do this!
I was in NYC for work and the girls that I frequently travel with are amazing - I'm so happy and blessed to call them friends. And as an added bonus, they are also very good at letting go of adulting...which is exactly what I needed!
The night started out as many other Saturday nights in NYC - a nice dinner, an amazing Broadway show (Kinky Boots...check it out!) and after-show drinks. Then, things got a little interesting...
We were staying near Restaurant Row on the West Side of the city. Amazing food, close to the water and at night, a little dancing magic happens.
Have you ever heard of Quiet Clubbing? It's so unbelievably fun!
After a bit of deliberation, we decided to give it a try. An unassuming warehouse space was wondrously transformed into a dance club like no other. It didn't open until 11pm (hello...I'm normally in bed way before this!) and stayed open till 4am. How can you stay out till 4am - well, with Quiet Clubbing, it's amazingly easy.
The concept is a dance club with three DJs, spinning a variety of sounds: 90's, 80's, and modern day hits. Here's where the real fun comes in - everyone gets a pair of light-up headphones with a three different settings. At the flip of the switch, you can dance to any of three different genres of music. Take the headphones off, there's no noise. Put the headphones on, and it's like your own personal dance party. You can tell what everyone else is listening to based on the color of their headphones. The DJs have a friendly competition to see how many dancers they can get to switch to their color, but all-in-all, it's super-fun, super-cool, and as far away from adulting as you can get!
We danced for more than three hours and never noticed the time. Never thought about where we had to be, what we had to be responsible for, or how we would feel the next day (oops!). For that span of time, we were free. We danced, laughed, and probably sang really off-key but it was amazing. Freedom!
When was the last time you did something where you didn't check the time? Didn't look at your phone? Didn't focus on what was next on your agenda or to-do list. That's what anti-adulting is. Taking a temporary break.
So, I have to admit - the next morning, we didn't feel so great. We were tired, our feet hurt, our head hurt, and we were dragging. But you know what? Somehow, I felt more refreshed than I had in a long time, a little less stressed, but a lot more like me!
It's ok to let go, have fun, and rediscover what's it's like to literally dance like a kid and just have fun.
Adulting can be great - I'm proud to look at my life as an adult. And though it always hasn't been easy, I've grown as a person, been responsible, and slowly-but-surely, I'm making a life that I'm happy to live fully. As I recently discovered, it's ok to let go, have fun, and rediscover what's it's like to literally dance like a kid and just have fun.
I highly recommend crossing the anti-adulting bridge every once in a while. Be good to yourself and dance away your responsibilities every once in a while. You'll be SO glad you did!